Why I Hate The Toxic Culture Of Men-Bashing
I never understood it.
All the men I've known growing up, have either been positive role models and friends or have been inconsequential but not altogether unpleasant. I'm not denying the fact that many girls have negative experiences when camming, I have a few of them myself, but that doesn't mean I'll stereotype half the world's population as being inferior or pathological in some way.
Male-bashing is just wrong on so many levels. As an erotic performer, I'm so grateful for having the friends, members, and fans I have. They're the consumers of my content, they're the people I interact with on a daily basis, they're my friends and confidantes. I would have to be a sociopath to trash talk my friends.
Male-bashing also doesn't help camgirls in any way - - for example, if, on a particular month, I make fewer tokens than usual. I could take that as a sign that I should step up my game, make fresh, original content, be more engaged - - or I could chalk it up to men being pigs and not giving me what I'm owed. It doesn't take a genius to see how toxic the latter thought process is.
Male-bashing also reduces my independence. The more I blame men for my problems, my state of mind, my situation, the more I make myself a victim, therefore constructing an identity where my happiness depends on men treating me a certain way. That, to me, the antithesis of freedom.
If someone in my cam room acts obnoxious or rude, it is still my choice whether I decide to feel bad about it, or brush it off. That, to me, is real independence. Bitching and moaning about how everything that's wrong with my life is because of men is the most childish, immature approach to gender relations I can think of.
Camming has been an amazing experience for me. I've met so many close friends in this space, both other camgirls as well as my members. I've met amazing guys, and continue to interact with them as my friends.
Blanket statements like "Men are (insert derogatory comment)" are usually indicators that the camgirl in question probably should be in some other line of work. To be a camgirl who loves what she does, and the kind of person who's loved and respected by her members, it's important to first realize that there is no space for misandry in the camming community.
The webcam girls I respect the most are the ones who love men, love their members, love their camgirl colleagues, and do as much as they can to spread positivity. Let's face it, life's going to throw enough negativity our way, there's no need to invent any more of it.
I'm sure a post like this will get pushback from some girls in the camgirl community, and that's alright with me - - it just means I'll have a list of people I know I'm not likely to get along with. And the rest of you girls, who also think male-bashing is the dumbest thing ever; I'm glad we're on the same page, let's be friends!